Everyone has a story in them

Looking for a good, short read? Here ya' go:


http://hoffmanblog.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Strong-Voices-Document2.pdf

At the link, you'll find a handful of short stories and essays written by young, uber talented youth living in my home town. Just one more reason to love living here.

A Bloody Dog Fight

I made Auggie, my six-year-old, cry the tears of an adult tonight. Tears of loss and surprise, grief and anger.

The incident started with McGoo and McGee, our sweet springer spaniels, breaking typecast and duking it out like Tyson versus Holyfield in the middle of the kitchen. McGoo -- tender-hearted, chubby McGoo -- instigated the battle royale when McGee strolled passed her, just a bit too close to the bowl of kibble McGoo had been guarding-and-not-eating for the past half hour. Suddenly, there was a rolling ball of snarling and teeth and fur and spit and blood and blood and more blood and yowling and me screaming and Auggie crying and dogs intent on killing each other . . .

I finally grabbed McGoo’s collar, kicking McGee back (not wanting to hurt her, sure I was going to lose a foot), McGoo still growling, either at the other dog or me, I wasn’t sure. All of us yelling. McGee bleeding, cowering. I tried checking McGoo for wounds and she growled at me. (ME. She follows me around all day, even into the bathroom while I shower, never away from my side, ME. Traitor.) At that point, I started the scolding, pointing my finger and yelling at the dog, as if she might understand, explaining, fiercely, I will never have an aggressive dog in my house, that I’m giving her away, that she is never to be allowed close to my child or pets again. Then I drug her back to a room and shut her in while I repaired poor McGee, bleeding from the face and paw.

I certainly didn’t mean to make Auggie cry. I found him ten minutes later, holed up with McGoo, hugging her, sobbing like a man with a kid on death row. I’m not saying that lightly. Body arched, red faced, howls akin to the dogs minutes ago . . . my boy thought I was coming to retrieve McGoo for the long mile. That some farmer down the road was going to take her out back and make her into horse meat.

Jeez, it was bad enough watching the two dogs I love like my children physically attack one another  . . . then I discovered my boy thought his momma was going to murder his beloved pet. I don’t know what made him cry harder, that I could abandon a creature I love (“What if I get in a fight, Momma?!”), or that a creature he loved was going to be abandoned. Oy vey. Emotional night for us all.

Writing Class

Oregon writers, check this out:

Save the Date for Writing En Plein Air at the Alder Creek Farm

MAY 22, 2012

Matt Love to lead workshop at the Alder Creek Farm on August 25th

Award-winning author Matt Love will conduct an all-day “En Plein Air” writing workshop at Lower Nehalem Community Trust’s Alder Creek Farm in Nehalem. Here’s your chance to study with a master, to spend a day that will combine lecture with observation, writing and workshopping your words.

“Constructing metaphors from nature is one of the most empowering creative exercises an aspiring writer can undertake,” says Matt Love. In this unique writing workshop, Oregon Coast author and teacher Love will lead participants through a hands-on, reflective process in the beautiful setting of Alder Creek Farm that will culminate in the creation of a personal metaphor that merges several literary and visual genres.

Matt Love grew up in Oregon City and is the publisher of Nestucca Spit Press. He is author/editor of many books to include Gimme Refuge: The Education of a Caretaker, Love & The Green Lady, Meditations on the Yaquina Bay Bridge, Oregon’s Crown Jewel of Socialism and The Teaching Maxims of Karl Love. In 2009, Love won the Oregon Literary Arts’ Stewart H. Holbrook Literary Legacy Award for his contributions to Oregon history and literature. His latest book is Sometimes a Great Movie: Paul Newman, Ken Kesey and the Filming of the Great Oregon Novel.

Love lives in South Beach and teaches English, photography, creative writing and journalism at Newport High School. He’s currently working on a novel about teaching high school.

Alder Creek Farm is a 54-acre conservation site preserved as open space by the Lower Nehalem Community Trust (LNCT). You’ll have a chance to wander the property for your observations, with views of the bay, an estuary, permaculture gardens, lots of wildlife, often a herd of elk.

The workshop will run from 930am to 3pm. The fee is $95, $85 for LNCT members, and includes a box lunch. There is space for 15 participants. Click here for a registration form,  or email Tela Skinner at mactela@nehalemtel.net or Vera Wildauer at vwildauer@gmail.com.

This workshop is a collaboration between the Hoffman Center’s Manzanita Writers’ Series and the Lower Nehalem Community Trust .

http://hoffmanblog.org/http:/hoffmanblog.org/writers-save-the-date-for-writing-en-plein-air/

THE AGE-OLD BATTLE: TOENAIL CLIPPINGS

Do you clip your toenails? Pop the cap off beer bottles? Wipe up spilt ketchup with a paper towel?

If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then you are a human being. If you answer “yes” to any of the following questions, then you are a pig.

Do you leave your toenail clippings on the couch? Do you leave the bottle cap on the counter (or table, or floor, or edge of the bathtub)? Do you believe spilt ketchup is best cleaned by the dog? If you miss the garbage while trying to dispose of a paper towel, do you leave it for the hand of god to pick up and throw away?

Cleaning house is an age-old battle, though admittedly the division of labor in that arena was not equitable until recent history. Even now, many women, or men, will claim to be responsible for the brunt of the cleaning, whether they want that role or not. But, regardless of who gets the short end of the cleaning stick, neither person should go out their way to litter, smear, or stink up the place. Controlling your impact on your environment should be innate. If the birds can master this concept, so can you. In other words, if birds don’t shit in their nest, why are you?

Perhaps you are not the “you” to whom I am referring. For your partner’s sake, I hope not.  But if you leave your underwear on the floor next to the hamper, if you leave a trail of sunflower seeds up the stairs, if you let latte containers rot in your car . . . then, yeah, I’m talkin’ to you.

But who am I to talk? I’m not perfect. I’m argumentative, stubborn, I love crappy tv, and . . . I’m no obsessive cleaner. I hate cleaning. I’m considering collecting refundable cans and bottles from the ditches in order to make money so I can hire someone to clean while I read or write or play with my child or do anything other than scrub splatters of unknown origin.

Yet I’m also not willing to live in squalor. Are you? If not, are you picking up your own refuse?  I’m only asking because I’m worried . . .

Ponder this. If someone in your neighborhood is making voodoo dolls, you don’t want to leave toenails or spitty sunflowers lying about. That’s just straight up dangerous behavior.

WRITING WORKSHOP FOR TEENS next week

WANNA’ GET AWAY FROM YOUR PARENTS?

STRONG VOICES is a writing camp for young adults   

led by an accomplished writing teacher, culminating with a publication of the camp’s  best writing and an Open Mic night.  

Teacher/writer Holly Lorincz will teach students to use fiction and non-fiction   narrative to consciously craft a message and unique personal voice while           understanding the impact on the reader.  

Camp will feature lectures, guided writing times, as well as instructor and small     group feedback. Journals, handbooks and writing utensils will be provided. Upon  request, work will be scored as a h.s. portfolio entry. 

Writers must provide their own lunches, transportation and $65 fee .                        

REGISTRATION or QUESTIONS         hollylorincz@gmail.com

HOFFMAN CENTER                                      JULY 16-19      

594 LANEDA AVE                                            AGES  14-20         

MANZANITA, OR 97130                                 COST   $65             

Mon-Thu: 10 am - 3 pm         Lecture, lab, critiques                   

Fri : 6:30 pm -8 pm                 Open Mic, publication                               

Teacher HOLLY LORINCZ is a state and national award winning  educator.                      

She has helped young adults publish news articles, essays, speeches and short stories in a variety of media outlets.  And she has just finished writing her first novel. You      can find her credentials and bio at   http://hollylorincz.wordpress.com/ .                         

I WON

Alright, a lot of you already know about this but just in case . . . 


My poem "Grandpa" won 19th place in the 7th Annual Writer's Digest Poetry Contest, out of thousands of entries. Yes, yes, very exciting, but more exciting is the beautiful book that's been published, housing my poem on page 30.  The collection is fabulous. I've created a link (below) so that you can revel in the aesthetics of the cover, or actually purchase the book. 


7th Annual Writer's Digest Poetry Awards Collection 


On that note, I'm off to bed. I promise to be witty and wordy tomorrow. Seriously, I promise. Would I lie to you?

Parenting: Fail

Upon discovering I was pregnant six years ago in a Mexican desert, surrounded by martinis, dirty sand and well-loved novels, Andre and I decided we would be good parents. No processed foods would cross the lips of our child (homemade bread daily), he would learn to maintain a minimal carbon footprint, he would spend time in the ocean and at operas, we would raise him in a foreign country for a year. Most importantly, no tv. Ever.


This morning, the six-year-old went upstairs by himself, ate an apple and two Western Family granola bars, double wrapped in plastic,  and played Star Wars, The Clone Wars Wii for an hour while we slept. 


He was safe. The dogs were with him (waiting for granola droppings). He was warm. Naked, sure, but wrapped in an afghan. He was not hungry. And the sugar probably helped to warm him. Most importantly, his vocabulary increased, describing to me in vivid detail the "origin" of General Grievous's army, the difference between the "Republic and the Separatists", and why he would not "clone the Zillo Beast."


We are the best parents ever. 


P.S. We only hire babysitters willing to play hide and seek in the bushes outside AND help the kid bump up a couple of levels on Star Wars (Ms. Pac Man did not prepare me for this level of technology).